Faith shaping in the lives of an adolescent is, among other essentials, fundamentally about two key factors: Helping a young person along the path of discovering her identity, and helping her realize her calling in life.

There are certain themes repeated over and over, season after season, on NBC’s The Biggest Loser weight-loss reality show. One of those themes used to really rub me wrong way—the idea that contestants like me needed to put ourselves first, to make ourselves the priority, and to stop worrying so much about others.

We were literally told to be selfish, that it was “our turn now.” To my ears that sounded like such an un-Christian and un-pastoral value, something of the world and reality TV—and certainly not of God. And I just didn’t get its connection to weight loss. Why couldn’t I be selfless and healthy at the same time?

Everyone wants to love and to be loved—they are the echoes that still reverberate in us from the Creator. But for whatever reason, it seems like it is getting more and more difficult to find and keep love. Some think it’s because we hardly talk anymore. With the advent of texting, twittering and Facebooking, it seems we’ve lost the art of holding in-depth, substantive conversations essential for long-term, loving relationships. Instead we have become masters of the pithy, witty, short blurb—the communication of a throwaway world. We throw away everything in our culture—even the things that should never be thrown away, things that are designed to last for a lifetime—like marriages.

"Where the Wild Things Are” is based on a beloved picture book by Maurice Sendak. This screen adaptation is directed by Spike Jonze and Dave Eggers. Max (played by Max Records) is a 9 year old boy who definitely feels neglected. Max builds a snow fort and wants his older sister to play with him, but she is too busy on the phone or with her friends. He gets into a snowball fight with his sister and her friends, but his fort is crushed by them. They don’t even realize how they have hurt Max, as he stands there crying, and his sister just leaves.

Sure is nice to get respect. Having a PhD, teaching at a Christian college for 20 years, and looking a little gray in the few places I still have hair all make it easier to get respect than when I began in youth ministry 33 years ago. Back then, I was trying to grow facial hair just to gain a little stature. It didn't work.

Feels good to drive a car that's not an embarrassment. Heck, I remember coming back into YFC after getting my masters degree, having no money to work with, and buying a $25, 18-year-old station wagon that lasted for a year. My Trailblazer is definitely a step up.