Titus Benton
Titus lives in the suburbs of St. Louis with his pretty wife Kari, adorable daughter Nora, and handsome son Malachi. He has worked in Student Ministry for 9 years in part- or full-time roles. He contributes to http://www.teensundayschool.com. When not cheering on the St. Louis Cardinals, he enjoyes listening to country music, eating greasy food, and reading John Grisham novels.
The Most Important Thing I Did This Week
- By Titus Benton
- Published 06/9/2008
I just did the most important thing I'll do this week.
It's Vacation Bible School week at our church. In our setting, that means over 200 volunteers steering 500 kids around. For me in particular, that means leading 30 volunteers and investing into the lives of over 150 students in our snazzy middle school edition of VBS. I bring up the numbers not to brag (I'm sure there are bigger VBSs out there), but to illustrate that I'm doing A LOT with VBS.
But the most important thing I'll do this week did not have anything to do with VBS. Instead, it had to do with a man and woman whose name I do not know. They were in our church parking lot when I arrived to pick up my sermon notes so I could look over them for tomorrow morning. It had been a busy day. I left mid-VBS to go officiate a funeral and then returned to VBS in time for recreation (thrashketball, anyone?). My son had his two month check-up (he's fine, thanks) and I even squeezed in some time to cook supper for my wife and little girl. Ministry, as always, is a balancing act, but I asked for it.
So I walk toward our front doors, it's after eight o'clock, I'm looking to quickly snag my notes and get home in time to watch American Gladiators, which my amazing wife had taped.
Before I could get to the door a man popped out of his car. He was limping, and "he had a question." I'll add here that he had the obligatory, seemingly rehearsed story. The fact that I say it that way gives you some insight into my attitude at the time. The bottom line was this--he and his wife had been flooded out of their home. He was on disability and struggling to make it. They'd slept in their cars the past five nights. They had no money. An apartment was lined up for Friday (it's Monday) with his next disability check, but were just looking for some money for a motel room. They were sick of sleeping in their car. He'd found a cheap place, but was short thirteen dollars.
I fought the temptation to poke holes in his story, to probe deeper and expose him as a liar. This was taught to me by many Christians who don't give money to beggars because "they might use it to buy drugs." I had to go inside and grab my sermon notes anyway, and I knew where we kept some petty cash. I could politely tell him to come back the next day or I could give him what he needed.
I looked at his slight frame, crooked ankle, and tired eyes, and knew I couldn't leave him standing there. Inside, I grabbed two bottles of water and twenty bucks. On my way out he was beside himself to get the help they so desperately needed.
I am not in any way patting myself on the back. Quite the opposite. I am very aware that there are people who do this day in and day out. I have friends who minister to the outcast and dejected every single day. They don't do VBS, they do ministry.
And today, I did the most important thing I'll do this week. There were no flashing lights or cool themes. There was no thrashketball and there wasn't a big crowd of students doing motions to the latest Fee song. There was me, two strangers, and Jesus, who was tripping all over himself to get me to realize that there is more to life than Vacation Bible School.
It's Vacation Bible School week at our church. In our setting, that means over 200 volunteers steering 500 kids around. For me in particular, that means leading 30 volunteers and investing into the lives of over 150 students in our snazzy middle school edition of VBS. I bring up the numbers not to brag (I'm sure there are bigger VBSs out there), but to illustrate that I'm doing A LOT with VBS.
But the most important thing I'll do this week did not have anything to do with VBS. Instead, it had to do with a man and woman whose name I do not know. They were in our church parking lot when I arrived to pick up my sermon notes so I could look over them for tomorrow morning. It had been a busy day. I left mid-VBS to go officiate a funeral and then returned to VBS in time for recreation (thrashketball, anyone?). My son had his two month check-up (he's fine, thanks) and I even squeezed in some time to cook supper for my wife and little girl. Ministry, as always, is a balancing act, but I asked for it.
So I walk toward our front doors, it's after eight o'clock, I'm looking to quickly snag my notes and get home in time to watch American Gladiators, which my amazing wife had taped.
Before I could get to the door a man popped out of his car. He was limping, and "he had a question." I'll add here that he had the obligatory, seemingly rehearsed story. The fact that I say it that way gives you some insight into my attitude at the time. The bottom line was this--he and his wife had been flooded out of their home. He was on disability and struggling to make it. They'd slept in their cars the past five nights. They had no money. An apartment was lined up for Friday (it's Monday) with his next disability check, but were just looking for some money for a motel room. They were sick of sleeping in their car. He'd found a cheap place, but was short thirteen dollars.
I fought the temptation to poke holes in his story, to probe deeper and expose him as a liar. This was taught to me by many Christians who don't give money to beggars because "they might use it to buy drugs." I had to go inside and grab my sermon notes anyway, and I knew where we kept some petty cash. I could politely tell him to come back the next day or I could give him what he needed.
I looked at his slight frame, crooked ankle, and tired eyes, and knew I couldn't leave him standing there. Inside, I grabbed two bottles of water and twenty bucks. On my way out he was beside himself to get the help they so desperately needed.
I am not in any way patting myself on the back. Quite the opposite. I am very aware that there are people who do this day in and day out. I have friends who minister to the outcast and dejected every single day. They don't do VBS, they do ministry.
And today, I did the most important thing I'll do this week. There were no flashing lights or cool themes. There was no thrashketball and there wasn't a big crowd of students doing motions to the latest Fee song. There was me, two strangers, and Jesus, who was tripping all over himself to get me to realize that there is more to life than Vacation Bible School.
Spread The Word
Comments
Comment #1 (Posted by Trey Gillete)
Let me first start by saying I think you did the right thing, but I wonder if this is always true?
My struggle with this is the love of God shown by just giving people what they ask for even if there is a question about their asking? I don't know.
The way I've tried to reconcile this is to ask myself what would I say if this person was not a stranger, but my son or friend. Would I just give into their request or would I dig into their story and see what the true need was? This of course is really messy and time-consuming and I often don't do this because of the whole time and effort thing.
But I wonder if this is what we are really called to do. The priest in the Good Samaritan story knew that he would be unclean and not able to carry out his appointments if he tended to the wounded man and walked on by like I have done many times. The good Samaritan took the man to shelter and provided for this needs and not his askings.
As I mentioned, I do think you did the right thing, but only because I believe that it was what God called you to do about the situation. I have been listening a lot harder to what God calls me to do in any situation, and still mess it up sometimes, but I am trying.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Comment #2 (Posted by Ben Terpstra)
I would for one like to here more about how, other churches deal with those that are looking for handouts (as it would seem) and if they have a ministry person just helping those in need? Because I believe this is one of the most rejested parts of any ministry (concerning local churches).
Comment #3 (Posted by Aaron)
good call.
Comment #4 (Posted by Aaron Giesler)
Ben, our church uses LOVE INC. www.loveinc.org which is a way that churches all over the city can show LOVE In the Name of Christ (catchy huh?). It uses a clearinghouse model to assess need to help ensure people don't get $20 from every church in town. But it also combines the resources of all the local churches, parachurch orgs, and other do-gooding people so the maximum number of people are helped in the best way possible. (short-term & long-term help) They also help church people find some great service opportunities for local people. It works for us and really takes a lot of pressure off of our staff to make judgment calls on who needs help and who is scamming. We still have a fund to help our own people (we thought it would be a little weird sending long-time members to another agency for help) But for everything it seems to work well.
Comment #5 (Posted by Titus)
thanks for your points, guys. to trey i would say that in my own tension between knowing when to give and when not to, i am only responsible for my heart. the question isn't will i meet every need they ask for, but am i WILLING to. i think a lot of times my prejudice against the down and outs blinds me from seeing that, in some way, they are Jesus. the least of these talk of matthew 25 is scary stuff, and i don't want to be a goat.
and ben, our church has a deacon that oversees benevolent ministries. what i didn't blog was that the next day this same man met with that deacon for follow-up and additional help.
let's keep struggling and maybe we'll end up doing the right thing more often than not, right guys?
peace.
