http://www.thejournalofstudentministries.com en-us N/A creative@jessrobin.com Thu, 20 Nov 2008 22:17:52 PST 20 http://www.examiner.com/x-1256-Atlanta-Dating-Examiner~y2008m11d18-Sexy-boys-only--headlines-by-your-10yr-old "Sexy boys please"; "Looking for a hottie", "Gotta get at a phatty" - lines read on a chat site. The aforementioned lines were written respectively by a 14yr old, 12yr old and a 10yr old. Before you get really upset about reading those lines from those children, ask yourself what you've done to curb the mindsets of our youth. We are so into making our adult lives perfect and comfortable, that we've forgotten to be our brother's keeper. These children come from all ethnic backgrounds and are saying the exact same things - "I want attention". Unfortunately, the attention they seek is the attention they should be getting at home. Instead, they take to chat rooms and start chatting to people who claim to be their own age or even older. Make no mistake about it, teens are getting a hold of webcams and chat sites and advertising themselves like Super Wednesdays' ads for Macy's. Some of you may say "But, Victory we already know this, it can't be that bad now, after all my teen knows better"? Well, I see girls who stand up and twirl for the camera; I see girls who are wearing form fitted pajamas and focus on their developed bodies; and I see girls who are telling their parents' names, occupations and school information. And check this out - their parents are never in sight. In fact, the teens laugh at their parents' verbal and futile computer attempts of locking them out of cyberspace. All of this, on a public site where anyone who signs up for free can watch internationally. Victory's suggestions: - When you see a young girl on a site like this, it is natural to want to attack. Instead, take her to the side (email or video-mail) and exercise love and compassion for a young lady who wants to feel included. She may strike back but at least something was said. I would try to engage the parent as well. Remember even though this child is interacting on a site loaded with minors and adults, she is a child so exercise good judgment and caution. If you have a teenage daughter, monitor her whereabouts by joining the Internet world and browsing what other teens are saying and doing. Sex, cyber-bullying and foul language are the major issues your teens fall victim to or are themselves predators. It's better to fix any psychological issues now, while their young, then wait until they become dysfunctional angry women who become promiscuous bed-hoppers searching for love and acceptance. - Be open to hearing another adult about your child's behavior. Don't be so quick to negate the words of a concerned adult regarding the activities or dress code of your daughter. After all, that person doesn't have to care! But since we all have to co-exist, we should lend a helping hand/ear when possible. - Be careful what examples you are setting. Whether or not you sit your teenage daughter down and discuss the facts of dating, she is going to watch everything you do. Question whether or not your dating example is one you would like your daughter to mimic. Either face your possible home issues now with your child, or face having to become a grandparent way before your time. Some parents recently came to me and thanked my involvement in their daughter's lives. I want them to know that I am not taking over parenting of their children but rather a "cool adult who cares" position. Currently I've been dubbed, Mama tokbox on www.tokbox.com. Feel free to listen to a few videos posted and comments made by yours truly. Just remember, teen doesn't start at 13 anymore. Start getting online as long as your child has access to a computer! As always, have fun and watch your children closer! P.S. Victory Waters is in no way singling out Tokbox as the only site in which teens are engaging in problematic behavior. Tokbox happens to be a site in which Victory Waters is currently active as a chatter. ]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Thu, 20 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.examiner.com/x-1256-Atlanta-Dating-Examiner~y2008m11d18-Sexy-boys-only--headlines-by-your-10yr-old http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2008/nov/18/teens_turned_aliens_how_communicate_kids_tough_yea/ By Leann Italie - Associated Press Writer November 18, 2008 Parenting teens is a tough, stressful job these days, but the payoff can be huge with a reserve of patience and the drive to ask for help when needed. Here are some strategies: Declaration of independence Adolescence is about struggle - for identity, independence - but the grab for power often competes with the intense need for reassurance at home and conformity among peers. Teens may fight the leash while also taking comfort in it. Robin Goodman, a child psychologist and art therapist in New York City, suggests parents lengthen the tether, stay involved and step in sooner rather than later when newfound freedoms are abused. Remember, she said, defiance is a tool used by teens. It's nothing personal. In the heat of the moment Dr. Mark Goulston, a Los Angeles psychiatrist who once trained FBI hostage negotiators, said parents must leave behind their fear, denial and "don't ask, don't tell" avoidance of confrontation and trust their guts in recognizing potentially violent behavior. To help rather than hinder, try calming down an upset adolescent in a heated moment by repeating what he says in a slow, measured tone. Hopefully, he'll begin to listen at the speed you're talking and feel validated, not violated. Help! My teen is an alien! Sarah Newton, author of the book "Help! My Teenager is an Alien," said parents must learn to translate the intergalactic language of their kids to help make things run smoothly. Some parents are fond of the opening lines: "I know how you feel" or "In my day." But you don't know what it's like to be a teen today, so stop what you're doing, look them in the eyes and zip your lips. Try to see a situation from their point of view, not through your own filters. Make it clear you want to understand and need their help. Be a parent, not a pal Parenting is not a popularity contest. Don't be afraid for your child not to like you for a time over words spoken or rules imposed. Mix criticism with praise. Be respectful, not insulting, and don't dismiss your teens' feelings or opinions as silly or senseless, said Rick Edwards, inpatient program director at the nonprofit Southwest Mental Health Center, a children's psychiatric hospital in San Antonio. Let go of guilt Dr. Jason Stein, a family therapist in Los Angeles, said parents of out-of-control teens are often vilified, leading to unnecessary guilt. "As a parent you're not allowed to show your humanity and struggle. You're not allowed to say, 'I hate my kid.' We've stigmatized these kinds of parents," he said. "We need to acknowledge the struggle. You basically buck up and do the best you can." Originally published at: http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2008/nov/18/teens_turned_aliens_how_communicate_kids_tough_yea/ ]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Wed, 19 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2008/nov/18/teens_turned_aliens_how_communicate_kids_tough_yea/ http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/Music/11/18/music.qa.david.archuleta.ap/index.html?iref=newssearch
Now, the 17-year-old runner-up is hoping all those votes on TV's top-rated show will parlay into album sales. His self-titled debut is in stores now.

So far, the teen's future looks promising. His first single "Crush" peaked at No. 2 on the Billboard Hot 100 charts and is a top download on iTunes.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Tue, 18 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/Music/11/18/music.qa.david.archuleta.ap/index.html?iref=newssearch http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5jldFTuKLofLmn40HFLfnIMlaVDvgD94FIOKO0 NEW YORK (AP) — The theologically conservative Diocese of Fort Worth voted Saturday to split from the liberal-leaning Episcopal Church, the fourth traditional diocese to do so in a long-running debate over the Bible, gay relationships and other issues. About 80 percent of clergy and parishioners in the Texas diocese supported the break in a series of votes at a diocesan convention. The Steering Committee North Texas Episcopalians, an umbrella group for those who want to stay with the denomination, plans to reorganize the diocese. They promised that "the Episcopal Church's work of Christian ministry and evangelization will go forward" in the region. A lengthy, expensive legal battle is expected over who owns Episcopal property and funds. The Fort Worth diocese oversees more than 50 parishes and missions serving about 19,000 people. The Steering Committee estimates that at least five parishes and hundreds of other churchgoers will remain with the New York-based national church. The other seceding dioceses are Pittsburgh; Quincy, Ill.; and San Joaquin, based in Fresno, Calif., where a legal fight over assets is already under way. National church leaders are helping local parishioners reorganize each diocese. All four withdrawing dioceses are aligning with the like-minded Anglican Province of the Southern Cone, based in Argentina, to try to keep their place in the world Anglican Communion. The vote is the latest fallout from the 2003 consecration of the first openly gay Episcopal bishop, V. Gene Robinson of New Hampshire. The 77-million-member Anglican fellowship, which includes the U.S. Episcopal Church, has roots in the missionary work of the Church of England. Most overseas Anglicans hold traditional views of the Bible and Robinson's consecration has moved the global communion toward the brink of schism. Breakaway U.S. leaders hope to form an Anglican province in North America. Years before Robinson's election, Episcopalians and Anglicans were already divided over how they should interpret Scripture on issues ranging from salvation to sexuality. That rift broke wide open when the New Hampshire bishop was installed. "Some have encouraged us to stay and fight as the faithful remnant in (the denomination), to work for reform from within," Bishop Jack Iker said in his speech before the balloting. "I can only reply by quoting the saying that `the definition of insanity is to keep on doing the same thing, expecting different results,'" he said. "The time has come to choose a new path and direction, to secure a spiritual future for our children and our grandchildren." Of the four withdrawing dioceses, only Pittsburgh ordains women. In 2006, the Episcopal Church elected its first female leader, Presiding Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori. Nationally, most of the 2.1 million Episcopalians don't consider their theological differences cause to leave the denomination, which has more than 100 dioceses. Outside the four that are splitting off, church officials estimate that about 100 additional parishes of a total of more than 7,000 have withdrawn on their own. However, the secessions have a large cost to the national church, not only in legal expenses and lost donations from the dioceses, but also in damage to the Episcopal public image as the U.S. church struggles to keep its place in the global Anglican family.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Mon, 17 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5jldFTuKLofLmn40HFLfnIMlaVDvgD94FIOKO0 http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2008-10-27-hatecrimes_N.htm?csp=34
Hate crimes against gays increased in 2007, up 6% from 2006 even though the overall number of hate crimes dropped slightly, the FBI reported Monday.

There were 7,624 hate crimes reported in 2007, down 1% from 2006. Crimes based on sexual orientation — 1,265 in 2007 — have been rising since 2005.

A hate crime is one motivated by bias against a person's race, religion, sexual orientation or other status.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Sat, 15 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2008-10-27-hatecrimes_N.htm?csp=34 http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/iraq/article5021028.ece
One grey-haired woman understands more than most the fear that has gripped Iraq's beleaguered Christian community over the past month.

Her brother, Bashar al-Hazim, was among the first to be murdered in a wave of targeted killings that has forced more than 2,000 Christian families to flee the northern city of Mosul.

Masked gunmen walked up to Mr Hashim as he stood with his two children outside their house in the east-side of Mosul in late September.

They demanded to see his identity card, confirmed he was Christian and executed the 41-year-old on the spot.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Fri, 14 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/iraq/article5021028.ece http://www.usatoday.com/news/religion/2008-10-29-love-dare_N.htm
In the beginning was Fireproof, a Christian movie about a firefighter who gets religion and saves his marriage.

The movie has been a surprise hit at the box office, but it also begat a book called The Love Dare, a 40-day marriage guide that turns out to be the movie's real star.

Since its release last month, The Love Dare has climbed best-seller lists. Nielsen BookScan, which monitors retail book sales, ranks it No. 1 in religion and No. 8 in adult non-fiction. (It's No. 20 this week on USA TODAY's list.) The book, whose advice one spouse can use even with a recalcitrant partner, is going into its ninth printing, and an estimated 1 million copies will be in print by next month.

But how sound is the advice?

Co-author Stephen Kendrick says it was drawn from a range of sources, including Scripture, marriage conferences and relationship books. He and brother/co-author Alex Kendrick also sought opinions from their wives and looked to the example of their parents, married 43 years in November.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Fri, 14 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.usatoday.com/news/religion/2008-10-29-love-dare_N.htm http://www.usatoday.com/news/religion/2008-11-05-depression-faith_N.htm
WASHINGTON — A study released by Temple University found that people who feel close to a higher power and pray often are more likely to be depressed, while people who attend religious services and feel that their lives have purpose are less likely to be depressed.

Lead researcher Joanna Maselko found that people who report being in a close relationship with a higher power are 1.5 times more likely to struggle with depression. She believes depressed people may use religion as a coping mechanism, and as a result, "they're more closely relating to God and praying more."

People who did not necessarily report being close to a higher power but did attend religious services regularly are 30% less likely to struggle with depression. Being involved in a faith-based community helps forge attachments to others, which prevents depression, the report said.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Thu, 13 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.usatoday.com/news/religion/2008-11-05-depression-faith_N.htm http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/28/health/28well.html?_r=3&oref=slogin&oref=slogin&oref=slogin
That question is one of the biggest challenges in the scientific study of marriage, and it helps explain why different studies produce different estimates of infidelity rates in the United States.

Surveys conducted in person are likely to underestimate the real rate of adultery, because people are reluctant to admit such behavior not just to their spouses but to anyone.

In a study published last summer in The Journal of Family Psychology, for example, researchers from the University of Colorado and Texas A&M surveyed 4,884 married women, using face-to-face interviews and anonymous computer questionnaires. In the interviews, only 1 percent of women said they had been unfaithful to their husbands in the past year; on the computer questionnaire, more than 6 percent did.]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Thu, 13 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/28/health/28well.html?_r=3&oref=slogin&oref=slogin&oref=slogin http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/families/article5063058.ece
A psychologist who found he could predict children’s prospects by testing whether they could resist eating a marshmallow is to scan their brains to find the neurological roots of temptation.

The “marshmallow test”, one of the world’s simplest and most successful behavioural experiments, was developed by Professor Walter Mischel.

He proved conclusively that the longer a four-year-old child was able to wait before taking a sweet, the better were his or her chances of a happy and successful life.

Mischel has been monitoring the lives of dozens of his subjects since he started the marshmallow experiments at a nursery on the campus of Stan-ford University, California, in the 1960s.

]]> no@spam.com (Super Admin) Wed, 12 Nov 2008 00:00:00 PST http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/families/article5063058.ece